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At one point in my life I was very depressed. It went so far that the thoughts that were the most calming for me were the thoughts of suicide. I wasn’t near committing suicide though.

I went to therapy and it was soon established that my self-esteem was low. I was recommended certain books that were supposed to increase the self-esteem if one did the practices in them.

I remember reading a comment for one of the books, where a woman told how life changing the book was for her. I started wondering how much it could change your life. That I would stop being depressed was to me at the time just a dream, something I theoretically thought that I could achieve, but it really just seemed like it in theory, that in reality it wouldn’t happen.

I started thinking, wondering how much one can change inside. How much change could one do to the experience of life?

Today I thought of how real the “techniques” and practices of Gnosis are. I’ve had ideas of the things explained in these teachings, but to experience it is really something else. These techniques really do work and I think I can’t even begin to imagine the potential that they hold. With practice I will experience it.

I remember the first time I consciously left my physical body to enter the so-called first of the nine heavens (astral). What an experience! I thought that I could do it, but here it also felt like “only theoretically, not in reality”. There I was, walking/flying consciously in another dimension. Another reality. When I read the book of self-esteem, I would never have imagined that I would do that. In this western society, how many people get taught that? Perhaps later, but then they might be convinced of it being nonsense.

Of course many who find these teachings at first will not know “the realness” of it. To experience things are really what matters; the theory is in itself worthless. It is only good in order to know what to do to get the experiences. I think many know of the old Gnostics, of “those who knew”, but few imagine that the techniques and practices to get Gnosis (knowledge through direct personal experience) are available today and that they indeed work. No matter how many people giving first hand accounts of what they have experienced, it only gets real for the individual when it is experienced personally.

I like this quote from Belsebuub:

Look, this is for ordinary people, it’s about a person self-realizing. Forget all the nonsense about becoming a spiritual figure, it’s about you and the person next to you self-realizing and being liberated from the processes of matter and nature. Self-realized people are not like the caricatures of spiritual figures that religions and fantasy has made them out to be, consciousness is neutral, and the personality remains, so you’ll appear to be the same superficially, as your personality won’t change, but you will feel very different and will perceive the world in a new way. I wish there was a strong group of self-realized individuals, such intelligent people could do so much for the world.

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